Have a Little Faith (in Community)
Community by Marvin Baldemor. Source: newirishart.com
Last week I saw an angel. Lying on lino stained crimson with blood, I prayed for salvation. She appeared silently, swiftly, and carried me to safety. On our journey, I was grateful for my faith, knowing that without hours spent in prayer, I should have bled out in solitude.
A fabrication- but bear with me, it resembles the truth.
One Tuesday this October, a complication from surgery left me tearing at my throat, choking on my own blood. My mother and I were alone in the house, and, although she is an angel, it is not her I was referring to. The blood was coming thicker and faster; we had to get to the hospital, and we didn't have the car. There was no option for a taxi, and an ambulance might take too long; no family nearby, friends unavailable - and yet, within minutes, a car outside, a hand on my knee, a smiling face — a chariot to safety.
Guardian Angel by Kathleen Gormley. Source: newirishart.com
My mother had rung an old neighbour, who had moved, but not too far. Without question, she came to our rescue. Why? My mother does not spend hours in prayer but nurtures another kind of faith: community. The community she has built, in her dedication to its importance, is the kind to save a life. With community, it is rare to bleed out in solitude.
I tend to waffle, so I apologise if that opening was too flowery for your liking. Pivoting from biblical references and bloody hands, let's talk TikTok.
Social media mental health gurus gush about boundaries, prioritising yourself, and preserving your precious energy. If you’ve missed an important birthday, a family obligation, or a friend's graduation to stare at your screen in the dark, you need not worry.
Nobody Likes Me by Canadian artist iHeart. Source: Abirpothi.com
As you're swaddled in your duvet cocoon, the familiar drone of short-form content soothing you to sleep, tiny technicolour pseudo-psychologists will wave away your anxieties. “You don’t owe anyone your time,” the nice lady croons from the screen, “No one is entitled to your energy.” She absolves you of your guilt, reassuring you that relationships still thrive without relation.
You can argue that we owe each other nothing—and let TikTok deem your sister a narcissist for needing a lift to the airport —but all those hours earned by avoiding the demands of others, all the energy you preserve from declining unnecessary invitations—what are you doing with it? The importance of human social interaction is recognised in disciplines ranging from sociology to neurobiology. Researchers from Penn Arts and Sciences claimed that those with more, or deeper connections, “live longer, healthier, happier lives”. They also stressed the reverse - that “chronic loneliness is more devastating to your health and well-being than smoking a pack of cigarettes a day”. Yet, in the age of so-called ‘social’ networks, we feel less connected than ever.
Loneliness Weighs by Manesta Art. Source: saatchiart.com
Digital networks can mask your ability to understand loneliness: you end up convinced that you're too drained to attend your cousin's communion, when in reality, your body is screaming because you haven’t felt true connection in weeks. You haven’t felt useful, or needed, or satisfied with your place among peers. These elements of socialisation have been pathologised and given negative connotations (TikTok gurus may call you anxiously attached). Social media feeds us a narrative that idolises the individual.
Individualism works hand in hand with a system that places capital on a pedestal. According to a 2018 article in the European Journal of Social Theory, current Western politics promotes a form of entrepreneurial individualism that is “antithetical to solidarity”. The emphasis on self-improvement and self-interest is central to both the pull-up-your-bootstraps mentality of Capitalism and the aforementioned self-care social media spheres. As individualism gains momentum, so does a reliance on corporations instead of community. Lacking a web of relationships, you rely on Uber for a lift, meal deals for your dinner, Moonpig for your Mam’s birthday. Everything costs money, and these costs are climbing. Without a community, anything that you cannot do for yourself, you have to pay for.
When you centre community, this changes. The acts you carry out for those you care about are often free. When you give a friend a lift to work, bring your neighbour a meal, or help paint your sister's house, you create a system detached from capital. Community service chips away at the iron grasp that consumerism has on society and provides alternatives for those who can't afford to operate in a system that prioritises wealth. Centring community isn't just rewarding, it's revolutionary.
Rebel Street Art by Cork Community Art Link. Source: mcdonnellpaints.ie
Join a community garden, a football team, or a college society. Paint something for a friend and feel your smile mirror theirs. Put on your brave face and meet the relatives for a dreaded lunch. Call your friend on the phone just to ask how they’re doing. Clean your housemate’s dishes because you know they’re tired. You might not technically “owe” others, but you'd be surprised at how precious a mundane relationship can become. Community is built on the back of everyday moments. All the little tasks you undertake in aid of a fellow human add up to a lifetime of loving. Community thrives when we look after one another, when we inconvenience ourselves for the sake of a friend. Community cares, and if you end up bleeding on your kitchen floor, it won't be TikTok that takes you to the hospital.
